where is the love?

Suppose I saw a picture of you, and in that picture I noticed you were doing something I didn't approve of, because I judged your actions to be "of the devil". Now, remember that I am supposed to care about you, so if I thought you were doing something dangerous to your soul, then out of love and concern, I should speak my concerns to you. That would be the appropriate course of action, if I loved you, whether my judgements were right or wrong.
But suppose, instead of coming to you with my concerns, I choose to go behind your back to your family and friends and tell them how disappointed I was in you, and how wrong your choices were? Indeed, what if I lectured / preached to all of the children in your family using you as an example of what not to do? What kind of person would that make me?